Faith & Reason Nexus

Marriage, like any relationship, requires care, respect, and effort from both partners to thrive. However, certain behaviors or external factors can deeply harm or even destroy a marriage. The first part of Twelve Marriage Killers includes these crucial issues:

1. Overcommitment

Overcommitting to work, social events, or extracurricular activities can strain a marriage. When one or both partners are too busy with external obligations, it often leads to neglect of the relationship. Emotional and physical distance grows, creating feelings of loneliness and disconnection.

2. Alcohol & Substance Abuse

Substance abuse, including alcohol, can have devastating effects on a marriage. It often leads to unhealthy coping mechanisms, violence, emotional neglect, and a lack of trust. The long-term consequences can erode the foundation of a relationship, making recovery difficult.

3. Excessive Credit & Conflict Over How Money Will Be Spent

Financial strain is a common issue in marriages. Excessive spending, debt, or differing views on financial priorities can lead to major conflicts. Disagreements about how to handle money, whether to save or spend, often cause tension and distrust between partners.

4. Jealousy

Jealousy can be destructive, even when it stems from feelings of insecurity or past experiences. Unfounded jealousy or possessiveness can damage trust and create constant emotional turmoil. It may lead to controlling behaviors and emotional distance, as well as damage the couple’s intimacy.

5. Selfishness

Selfishness in a marriage means prioritizing one’s own needs and desires over those of the partner. When both individuals act self-centeredly, the relationship becomes unbalanced, with one or both feeling neglected or unimportant. This behavior can gradually erode the affection and respect needed for a healthy partnership.

6. Unrealistic Expectations

Expecting perfection from a partner or from the marriage itself sets the relationship up for failure. Unrealistic expectations often result in disappointment, frustration, and resentment when reality doesn’t match up to the ideal. Both partners must recognize and accept each other’s flaws, as well as the realities of married life.

7. Interference from In-Laws

While family relationships are important, excessive interference from in-laws can create tension and conflict in a marriage. If one partner is overly influenced by their family, it may cause divisions between the couple, leading to feelings of resentment, jealousy, and a lack of autonomy.

These seven factors, if left unchecked, can deeply damage a marriage. Awareness and proactive solutions are key to preventing them from taking root and causing lasting harm.